9 Effective Ways on How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws

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How to deal with disrespectful in-laws? Because Marriage brings a set of another family that you have to embrace. These new family members cannot be most welcoming for starters and they might give you a hard time.

Therefore, the phase after the honeymoon period will take a lot of time and adjustment on your part. So you have to be patient and accepting in your attitude.

But, what if your in-laws treat you with zero respect! Then they will give you a real tough time and its adverse effects might be in the form of your marriage disruption. Therefore, let’s put light on how to deal with disrespectful in-laws today. 


How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws? 9 Effective Ways

1. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws – Show A United Front With Your Spouse

I will say that it is easier said than done. Because all your dreams of hanging out with your siblings-in-law and having cheerful tea with your parents-in-law are all shattered and you find it tough to cope up. Besides, they don’t respect you and hate you for stealing their child!

So in this situation, you have to take your husband in confidence. He might not understand you at first and would brush off the whole thing by saying that it’s in their nature to be like this. But you have to clear your point by telling him how you feel and how badly you are treated.

You can have a calm discussion over this. Like mature adults. The other important thing is to show your unity as a couple in front of the in-laws. Never argue, never fight in front of your in-laws as this will give them more reason to hate you. 

Always act as one and stay united on the front. By doing this, you will challenge the perception of your in-laws about you and they might start thinking about you differently. This is the first effective step to take while dealing with your disrespectful in-laws because it aims at their psyche!

Show That You And Your Partner Are United When Your In-laws Are Around

2. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws – Respond Respectfully

In a home with a new family it is difficult to stay locked in your bedroom all the time and we DON’T suggest that. Therefore, you have to be out and interact with all the people in your new home. It won’t be easy but it will give you away from dealing with your disrespectful in-laws. 

For example, if your mother-in-law criticizes you on how you clean the house then let her know that you are open to learning. If your father-in-law criticizes you about your career then tell him it’s your passion and ask about his career instead to move the subject. 

The point is, you don’t have to lower yourself to their level of disrespect. Do answer them, but answer them with respect and a certain assertiveness. This practice will make you used to their nature and will also provide a way to deal with them calmly and without any hassle.

Respond With Respect To Your In-laws

3. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws – Avoid Public Conflict

Okay, so you have to avoid public conflict and drama at all costs! Because you don’t want the world to know your present state. And frankly, every family goes through problems and issues. It is just the time that solves them eventually.

So you have to be cautious at this. Because your in-laws are disrespectful already and they will not care if you are humiliated in public. Therefore, you need to maintain a safe distance from them whenever you are out.

For instance, you can be on the other end of the table when you all are out for dinner. Plus, avoid participating in any discussions whatsoever. This will prevent you from losing your cool. 

                                        Avoid Public Conflict At All Costs

4. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws- Set Some Rules With Your Spouse

Suppose if you live opposite another street from your in-laws or even more far than that. You need to set some rules with your spouse which should work for both sides of the family. They can be like:

  1. All visitors including your and your husband’s family must call before visiting. This way, there are fewer chances for them to invade your private space.
  2. Family members must never interfere in your personal matters unless you give them permission to do so. If one them tries, turn them down with respect. 
  3. Avoid touchy & sensitive topics on either side.
  4. If you have children, then you and your partner finalize all his/her decisions and you need to be firm in this case as your child is your responsibility by all means. 

If you set out these rules or similar guidelines in accordance with your needs, then you will deal with your disrespectful in-laws like a pro!

how to deal with disrespectful in-laws
Set Some Rules Regarding Your In-laws With Your Spouse

5. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws- Maintain A Sense of Humor

Even after knowing all your in-laws’ traits it is good to maintain a light-hearted atmosphere around them.It means that you can maintain a certain sense of humor with them. Plus, you don’t have to take their every taunt or snigger to heart because you know their nature.

Besides, if you reply back with a pinch of humor then they might laugh at it too. Remember, this stage approaches when you have ample interaction with your in-laws. Then you will know where to strike the right chords and avoid conflicts to the max. 

What more great way is there to deal with disrespectful in-laws than to laugh out at whatever they say. 

6. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws- Don’t Whine Or Complain 

You know the best way to solve any issue between you and your in-laws is by keeping it private. You don’t need to whine or complain about your in-laws to other people. Even your friends– you should not share all the gory details of the issue. Why? Because you will provide a topic for gossip to the others this way and that will have adverse effects if your in-laws got to know what you say behind their back.

In-laws are not very ideal when it comes to gossip, therefore, you must always abstain from it. Also, whatever is the issue, talk with your husband and take him in confidence. You must understand that he also can’t leave his parents but he can provide you with all the necessities too as it is your right. 

Therefore, whenever there is an issue between you and your in-laws, keep it private and within the boundaries of your home. Don’t let it become the public property and try solving it by talking out with them. Make your stance clear and leave it to them to think. 

I am not saying that this will put a stop on them on being disrespectful. Your patience and quiet demeanor will not let a house’s atmosphere disrupt, and, that is most important for you to have a sane mind!

how to deal with disrespectful in-laws?
Do Not Gossip About Your Private Issues

7. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws – Behave Your Best On Special Occasions 

Well, occasions are for making new and good memories. Therefore, you should always be on your best behavior with your in-laws. To avoid maximum trouble, stay out of their ways, and keep the conversation going as if nothing happened.

Your good behavior might make them realize that you are not that bad after all and they might take a step towards mending ways with you. 

Therefore, watch out for Christmas and New year this week and make a resolution to solve out all your differences this year. 

how to deal with disrespectful in-laws
Be At Your Best Behavior On Family Gatherings Or Events Alike

8. Keep Your Distance From Toxic Topics

If your in-laws are disrespectful then it is not a surprise that their. You know that toxic people have a bad impact on your mind therefore, avoid being a part of their discussions.

For example, if you are meeting your in-laws for lunch then just eat your food silently and do not participate in their gossips or discussions. Keep in mind that they are not worth spoiling your mood, time, and energy. Keep your mind focused on the good things and on what’s important. 

This is one beneficial way of dealing with your disrespectful in-laws. 

9. How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws- Be Considerate

It is difficult to be considerate in a situation like this but try being one and you will deal with the problems with a better approach. For instance, if your mother-in-law is cranky then think about your mother. Remember the times when she used to be cranky? What was your approach? How did you deal with it? Apply the same approach here and the results might be in your favor!

Remember, all human beings are made of love at the core. Therefore, it might take time to crack your disrespectful in-laws but eventually, your patience and love will get the better out of them.

Therefore, it is who has to be considerate, patient, and steadfast over here. Also, remember that these are your husband’s parents. They brought him into this world and raised him to be the amazing human being that he is today. Therefore, always respect them for that. 

FAQ – Frequently Asked Question On How To Deal With Disrespectful In-laws

How Do You Get in Laws to Respect You?

Being a Good Husband or wife and Parent. Love and respect your partner. The best path to winning over your in-laws is by being a good husband or wife. Your spouse’s parents may instinctively appreciate you if they see that you are making their daughter or son happy.

How Can I Get Rid of My in-Laws?

Follow your principles. If your in-laws try to disagree with you, quietly reaffirm your boundaries and your reasons for slashing contact. If other household members condemn your choice or try to make you feel shame, inform them that you are protecting your well-being and your other connections, and go it at that.

What to Do When You Don’t Like Yours in Laws?

To help you manage spending time with a large family, here are some ways of effectively dealing with your in-laws. Get your spouse’s support, do not wait for them to change, do not judge yourself or your spouse, fend for yourself before and after.

Should You Marry Someone If You Don’t Like Their Family?

You are going to marry your partner, not his or her friends and family members. So, if you do not like them it’s not the end of the world. As Buckman says, constant disagreements with your mother-in-law, and other important players in your spouse’s life, can make for a tough married life. 


If your in-laws don’t decide to change their disrespectful ways then let the way things are. You cannot control other people’s actions so keep your chin up and let the way things are because you made an effort right?

But always treat them with respect because that will stand as an outstanding difference between you and them!

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