Why Am I Still Single – 40 Subtle Reasons You are Still Single

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Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and constantly ask a question why am I still single? Am I that bad to be in a relationship? Are you looking for the reasons why am I still single?

If yes, then this article is a treat for you and you will find out all your answers in this article.

Let’s dig into it!

Table of Contents

Why Am I Still Single – 40 Subtle Reasons

There are hundreds of reasons why a person can be single throughout life. In this section, we are sharing with you around 40 reasons why you are asking yourself “Why Am I Still Single”!

1. Your Own Choice:

Many people prefer to remain single because they do not want to be attached to someone and want to enjoy their lives.

But some people are just being tired of being in relationships; they have been stung many times through the dating pool. So, they have no more desire to be in a relationship anymore.

2. You have High Standards:

Maybe you have been greatly influenced by Hollywood Romcoms and think that someone will come to look for you and sweep you off your feet then you are likely to ask why am I still single.

When you have high hopes and dreams about life to be played like a movie then you are wrong, you should have to set realistic expectations in a relationship to make it healthy.

3. Looking for the Best Next Thing:

In this revolutionary world, dating apps have made people so confused to satisfy their needs, they want more & more perfections when every time they meet to anyone.

Well, there is nothing wrong if you are a perfectionist but you should have to give a chance to those whom you like. Do not forget the fact that many couples feel intimacy in each other after spending a few weeks or months together.

Why am I still single is not your concern
Do not change yourself for others

4. Have a Broken Heart:

This is the most common theme to be seen in many youngsters nowadays when someone cheats on you or ditch you deeply, it hurts a lot and you feel safer to shut off the feelings of your heart to prevent yourself from being hurt more.

Experts say that it is a good idea to take time to heal your heart after a rough breakup.

5. Why Am I Still Single – No Compromises:

Life is the name of compromises; many girls are still single because they are not willing to compromise in a relationship.

“Life is about Compromises (not settling)”, narrated by Stef Safran (expert), If you have high standards about perfect height, hair, or status of someone then you need to acknowledge the reality that many people do not marry with their ideals but still have a happy life.

6. Afraid to be Committed:

This phobia is observed more in men rather than in women, there could a lot of reasons to this fear, the first and foremost reason is being in the wrong relationship & remain committed to that partner forever either you are happy in that relationship or not.

Looking for the next best thing is more prioritized by them rather than building a strong bond with their current partner.

7. Have Chosen Wrong Partners:

This pattern happens all the time when after a break up you look for another one who is just like your ex, or nothing like your ex (apparently). Taking a close look at your past relationships can be very helpful for you if you fall into this category

Another factor is your family history, if you grew up in an environment that was abusive then eventually you will find yourself in an abusive relationship. You should have to make better choices for a future relationship.

9. Still Live in the Past:

In this case, you try to see the new relationship in the canvas of the past, you always choose to compare your date with your ex so that if you find any similarity you just run!

You should have to see the new relationship in a brand new love lens, accept them, and enjoy your date rather than taking it as an interview.

9. Negative Mindset about Intimacy:

There might be two reasons behind this thought, either you think you are unworthy of intimacy & believe that you are not pretty enough for someone, or you think the other person is not capable of providing you the desired intimacy.

If you are such a person then you need to break out this negative thinking cycle and internalize new messages about yourself & other people.

10. You Desire to Remain Free:

Not every person is desperate for not being in a relationship. Some people like their season of singleness & make themselves worthy enough for themselves as well as for others too.

They try to work on themselves and make them fit emotionally, financially, spiritually, and mentally before drag someone in their life.               

Perfectionism is state in why am I still single
Why am I single.

11. You do not Want to be Settled:

People might think that you are still single because of your high standards but in my opinion, it is better to be single rather than to compromise and settle down in a relationship unwillingly just because you have societal pressure on you.

Do not let anyone take control of your life & force yourself into something that is below your standard.

12. Issues with Dating:

Modern dating has become more objectifying. How can just a picture of someone depict them? And you just look for the similarity and ping them in the messages and depending on your texting skills.

Just like you meet someone in the bar, being half inebriated looking for someone to sleep with is not a healthy way to start a relationship. The main point is, you are looking at the wrong place.

13. Do not Want to be in a Relationship:

Maybe you are contented with your current situation of being single, or you have grown up in such an environment that teaches you to be self-reliant and you only learn to count on yourself.

It is an important social skill to get closer to someone and healthily share your feelings. But some of us lack this skill due to the invalidating environment of your house. You must need to practice to tolerate intimacy.

14. Why Am I Still Single – Scared of Attachments:

Attachments hurt, and this thing made people afraid of being in a relationship. We caste our past vision into the future and suppose the next outcome will be the same if we get into a new relation.

This condition is known as catastrophizing; viewing a situation as worse than it is. You need to aware of the factors that are involved in a healthy relationship. Read books or talking with experts will help you a lot.

15. Waiting for the Right One:

Maybe you are looking for the right one, or looking for that specific spark into someone’s eyes. You observe people on dates, how they act, talk, and respond. You are more curious to know about their mentality rather than appearance.

You want someone to love you, appreciate & value everything about you. Accept you as you are. 

16. Get Exhausted of Dating:

You might reach a point where you become exhausted with dating and still did not find anyone to whom you let in and give them a chance. You find it purposeless to going on a date anymore.

If you are burnt out of dating, this is a time for you to take care of yourself, have a break or vacation and give yourself some “me” time.

17. Lack of Accountability in Yourself:

This is one of the important reasons for being single, if you are not ready to be in a relationship then go and work on yourself, make yourself better enough for someone instead of searching externally, and at the right time, the right person will appear.

18. You Believe that “Love equals Pain”:

A person might develop this prospective from childhood. If you are of the view that in this way you can avoid people’s judgment, find an escape from rejection, or could be free then you have to limit this belief.

Holding the belief that “relationships are dangerous” may restrain us from attachments to save us from heartaches so do not ask why am I still single.

Reason for why am I still single

LIve with no worries

19. Cherish your Alone Time:

Some say they do not want to be in a relationship because they love their alone time or they want to put all of their energy in business or career.

Do not bluff yourself, everyone needs a companion to share his/her thoughts, feelings, or pain. This is just a divisive factor.

20. You might Seek for a Soulmate:

Everyone wants to be understood by someone who he cherishes and wants them to be a part of his life, you want your connection emotionally, physically, and even spiritually strong with that one.

Therefore, you are looking for a real deal.                                                       

21. Why Am I Still Single – Your Selfishness:

You may do not find it soothing to be in a relationship and do not give a damn to this world. You have your fantasy world. To you, this world is everything for you and you enjoy your freedom.

22. No One Likes you:

This thought originates from your consciousness, you consider yourself ugly or a loser and think no one will going to like you.

It means that you have not yet met someone who is crazy about you and loves you for yourself.

23. You are Tired of Dating for Fun:

Most of the time people take this dating thing for fun; they just want to pass out their time and relax their mind or might be fulfilling their physical desire.

But at one point you become tired of all this and find no meaning of being in a relationship because you never took it seriously and have the same thinking about others.

24. Not Much Outside Exposure:

Going out is expensive though, in big cities like New York, guys mostly have no money to blow on the weekend going out or for a date.

But in reality, they want to meet up with people and have a date.

25. Why AM I Still Single – People Try to Change You:

It is the most depressing situation when you are dating someone who wants you to be different from whom you really are, he is not willing to accept your differences, he tries to mold you into their perfect version of his mate.

26. Too Aggressive to Handle:

When you realize that you are being cheated by someone or all that was just flirt.

Unfortunately, you have come this far in a relationship alone, you become frustrated and aggressive let you down. At that moment you need to calm down for a bit and be yourself.

27. You do not Like Anyone Who Likes you:

You might have someone in your life, who thinks you are the center of his universe & cannot imagine his life without you. But you find no interest in him.

Nothing is wrong with that because you cannot force feelings. So, that’s why am I still single.

28. Why Am I Still Single – You Give Up too Easily:

When you have a date, do you quit too easily on it? Do you end it for very minor reasons?

You need to think again and realize that every relationship becomes healthier with road bumps & arguments. To play it smooth you need to understand each other’s’ views.

29. Limiting yourself to One Place:

Some people might stick to one dating app and try hard to find a date instead of looking at another place, town, or app.

Try a new way is hard at first but it will increase your chances to find a new date.

30. Why Am I Still Single – You Try too Hard:

Sometimes not being in a relationship make you desperate because being single creates a loop that is hard to break.

You might come up too strong that scare the people away. Instead, you try to set some realistic expectations for things to come out naturally.


Stop asking for why am I still single & respect yourself

                                                        Live as you want to live

31. Make an Interesting Dating Profile:

It might be a reason that you find it difficult to fill up your dating app profile and list such things that turn off people from talking with you such as you may not be listing your best qualities instead of writing those qualities that people do not care about. You need improvements.

32. Socially Awkward:

If you are a shy person and find it difficult to break the ice & start the conversation with people first, then you need to improve your communication skills or you can use dating apps instead because it requires less face-to-face interaction.

33. Why Am I Still Single – You Make Excuses:

Well, some people find excuses to not be in a relationship, as they want to accomplish their goals first, such as to a certain weight goal or have a good career.

I know this is important but some people find it as an excuse to never find a date.

34. Got an Attitude Problem:

Some people always try to blame others for their flaws instead of looking toward themselves, it quite difficult to criticize yourself. You need some honest opinions from people and then improve yourself because self-awareness is key.

35. You do not Know What you Want:

Sometimes you do not even know what you are looking for. You are uncertain about your thoughts & figuring out the traits which attract you in a partner.

To go on a date with a different type of person will help you to make your mindset.

36. Why Am I Still Single? – Lack of Confidence:

If you have a lack of confidence in yourself, you do not find comfort in your posture, thoughts, or behavior while in the company of others. Be confident in your body because of it the most captivating thing that makes you capable of carrying yourself anywhere.

37. You have Learned from Other People’s Mistakes:

You see a lot of people around you, your friends or family members to leap into a wrong relationship and suffer afterward. It creates an awful feeling to watch them in pain and your conscious it scared you off to be in a relationship.

38. Why Am I Still Single – Your Mind Leaps to Marriage:

On your very first date, you seek the marriage potential in the other person and if you see nothing in them, you never bother to go on another date.

IN this way you might lose a lot of opportunities to build your relationship and find interest in your partner.

Do not ask why am I still single & enjoy your singleness season

Do not let your standard down for people

39. Why Am I Still Single – You are Intimidating:

If might happen that you are going through the miserable phase of your life or experiences crises in your career. This is the sad truth and few find it intimidating especially women.

But that does not mean you should change yourself to be appreciated by people.

40. Why Am I Still Single – You Have Hidden Issue:

Sometimes you also do not aware of the actual reason for “why am I single”. When you looked at your love life & it seems complex but you do not even bother to think about it. You can tell all the details about you to an expert counselor and he will suggest ways to improve your life. He can help you answer you the dreaded question of why am I still single.


Always remember, to live a contented life, you need to open yourself up to new experiences, try to take risks, love people around you. When the right person appears in your life, you are ready for genuine love & commitment rather than asking yourself “Why am I Single”.

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