Funny Things to Say to a Narcissist- To Break the Tension

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Are you looking for a way to break the tension when dealing with a narcissistic personality?

If so, then it could help to arm yourself with some clever responses that will provide a small dose of humor in an otherwise awkward situation. While confronting someone’s inflated ego can be tricky, adding just the right amount of wit to your words might make all the difference and pierce the veil of their self-absorption.

Whether you need something lighthearted or cutting, here are some funny things to say to a narcissist so you can manage any difficult interactions in stride!

What is Narcissism?

If we take a more scientific approach, narcissism is a mental health problem in which a person has an inflated sense of self-worth and an excessive need for attention. They always make choices that benefit themselves. Such people lack empathy towards other people.

Narcissism traits show up in teens and early adulthood. And it is complex that leads a person to this condition. But there are multiple factors that cause narcissism to show up. It’s a combination of genetic factors, neurological factors, and the environment in which the person lives.

“Behind every narcissist is an extremely insecure person”

“Behind every narcissist is an extremely insecure person”

The narcissist feels “small,” so they make themselves look “big.” They somewhat have been targeted with an inferiority complex in some part of their lives that has lead them to a path where either they gain a certain quality to show off or simply they become obsessed with being concerned about themselves that they forget that the world surprisingly does not stop with them, ouch!

It is somehow still a challenge to identify a narcissist. These are the people with, particularly difficult personality traits. It is very important to identify narcissists around you and to know how to deal with them.

Relationship with Narcissist

There are three stages of a relationship with a narcissist. And they use different phases in every stage. These stages are:

1. The Ideal Stage

At the start of the relationship, narcissists may seem kind and caring. They use phrases like:

  • You are my soulmate
  • I have never met anyone like you before
  • No one understands me as you do
  • It is the destiny we have met
  • I have never felt such beautiful feelings before
  • I love you so much that you don’t need anyone else
  • You are just perfect
  • We will be always together

Narcissists will lay it on thick in this stage, and it may be hard to tell them from actual kind and caring people. That will change in the following stages of your developing relationships with narcissists.

2. The Devalue Stage

After giving you the ideal days of your life their next stage is to devalue you. Once the narcissist knows you are with them completely they take no time to show their true colors.

Clean your mouth, there is still some trash around your lips

So they start to insult you and criticize every little thing you do. They say everything to make you feel belittled and your confidence gets shattered. 

During this phase narcissists utter phrases like:

  • Are you crazy?
  • You are over-sensitive
  • No one likes you
  • Why are you so insecure
  • What’s your problem?
  • Am I less important to you than your friends?
  • Why do you always start crying
  • You are so negative

Narcissists will devalue everything you love, such as your interest, hobbies, or family. Narcissists insult you by saying:

  • Your friends are not good
  • Do you like this dress? It’s terrible
  • I can’t believe you enjoy playing piano
  • Your parents do not like me, so stop meeting them
  • This makes you look so stupid.
  • Your dress is weird
  • You can not wear this because I don’t like it

3. The Discard Stage

When a narcissist has destroyed you emotionally or they have found another person to abuse they get even worse with you. Their insults are at the worst level. So they leave the relationship as a “winner”

In this stage narcissists will hurl poison and blame them for everything:

  • Everyone hates you
  • You are the worst person
  • No one can love you 
  • You will be alone for the rest of your life
  • You are your enemy
  • Everything with you is drama
  • You do not love me enough
  • You never tried to be with me

Thus, it will end up not only in heartbreak but also indulging in you judging yourself and becoming a victim of an inferiority complex. It must be understood that a narcissist can only move in a relationship that is either equally narcissistic or if the relationship is always all about him –which is not possible.

Funny Things to Say to a Narcissist

The best way to communicate with a narcissist is often with a witty sense of humor.

After all, why walk away from arguing with someone when you can just reply with something funny about their self-centered nature?

Don’t forget to set boundaries, though! After all, no matter the response, always come right back in the same way. With all this in mind, nothing beats a good laugh after dealing with a difficult situation.

  1. I am not an astrologer but I am sure that the earth still revolves around the sun, not around you.
  2. Oh! I forgot that I only exist when you need me.
  3.  Go and pour a glass over you, because unfortunately to your surprise, no one else is going to do it for you.
  4. Feed your ego yourself, I am busy doing important things.
  5. I have this wonderful plan where we can equally love each other instead of just me loving you. 
  6. Feed your ego yourself, I am busy doing important things.
Funny Things to Say to a Narcissist
  1. Why did you cross the road? You must have thought it was a boundary
  2. Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of trash. Oh, sorry, did it hurt your inflated ego?
  3. Clean your mouth, there is still some trash around your lips
  4. I’m no astronomer, but I’m sure the earth revolves around the sun, not you.
  5. Oh! I forgot that I only exist when you need me
  6. Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of trash – oh sorry, did it hurt your inflated ego?
  7. My friend told me about a Narcissus flower – so what does that make you?

How Can You Insult a Narcissist?

When dealing with narcissists it can be tricky to insult them without coming across as petty or rude. The key to insulting a narcissist is by making a self-aware joke about their inflated ego. 

But is still sometimes good to vent your frustration at narcissists in general with some good jokes,

So here we have a few good narcissist jokes to help you insult that narcissist that you love to hate.

  1. Hey, do you know how many people like you it takes to change a light bulb? None. You all use gaslighting 
  2. Do you guys have a helpline that is ought to be like Hey, how can you help me?
  3. Why don’t narcissists like going to the park? Because they prefer to be the center of attention.
  4. What do you call a narcissistic fish? A “me-rmaid”!
  5. How many Narcissists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they think it’s always someone else’s fault!
  6. Do you have a helpline that says, “Hey, how can you help me?”
  7. Why did the narcissist cross the road? So everyone would look at him!
  8. How can you spot a narcissist in the wintertime? He’s always wearing his favorite scarf!
  9. What do lawyers and narcissists have in common? They both love talking about themselves!
  10. What does a true narcissist say when he looks into a mirror? “I could just sit here all day looking at myself”
  11. What did one mirror say to another mirror after seeing an arrogant person walk past them? “Wow, that was quite an ego trip!”
  12. Did you hear about the two mirrors who got married? The wedding was so reflective!
  13. Why don’t Narcissists get hungry or thirsty? Because no matter what anyone else says, they only care about

What Can You Say to a Narcissist to Shut Them Down

Narcissists are difficult people to deal with, and it can be exhausting trying to have a conversation or interaction with them.

It takes patience, cleverness, and precision to set narcissists back in their place when they send out their constant criticism and manipulation.

A witty comment that shuts narcissists down could sound something like, “I bet you think this situation is all about you. I suggest we each worry about our own happiness instead of trying to make the other one miserable.

Why did you cross the road? You must have thought it was a boundary

This type of comment addresses narcissists without fueling an argument or putting off an intense vibe; it would most likely crack a narcissist up and lessen the tension.

Ultimately, letting narcissists know that their needs aren’t your priority is a great way to shut them down.

Funny Comebacks for Narcissists

Truth be told, good comebacks, when faced with a narcissistic person, can be hard to come by, especially if the narcissist is good at tossing out insults.

However, it’s still possible to shut them down in a witty and pointed way without engaging in an argument that you’ll regret later. An effective retort may be something along the lines of “I live life for my own amusement; I don’t need anyone’s approval” or “I love hearing myself talk so I know how good it feels“.

These short comebacks can leave narcissistic people speechless and send a clear message that their opinions don’t phase you.

How Do You Respond to a Narcissist’s Insult?

When faced with a narcissist’s insult, good comebacks can be an effective tool for getting in the last word.

By delivering your response with wit and humor, you are showing them that their attack will not affect you.

You can also choose to live life on your terms and simply ignore their words, as it frequently has no real impact on how you see yourself or what you’re trying to achieve.

Narcissists live for negative interactions hoping they get a reaction out of people and they take pride in reducing someone else’s confidence. So by not engaging, you show that their insults have no power over you – which they secretly loathe and love hearing!

Final Thoughts on Funny Things To Say To A Narcissist

It’s important to know that not all Narcissists are created equal – some are angrier than others, and may react differently to your words.

That being said, no matter which funny thing you decide to say to a Narcissist, make sure you have a plan in place should the situation take an unexpected turn.

Humor can be incredibly powerful but it can also backfire if used ineffectively. If you do decide to try out some of these ideas for yourself, don’t forget to stay vigilant and watch out for any changes in the behavior of the person you’re joking with.

Laughter is the best medicine when used properly and it might even surprise you with how they respond!

At the end of the day, it all comes down to how self-aware each individual is – if they understand themselves enough then they should be able to handle a joke thrown their way without taking offense.

Ultimately, making light of narcissism can be a refreshingly new way to break up some of its more serious connotations – so go ahead and give it a shot!

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