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“I don’t deserve to be happy.” This thought is the product of chronic or acute depression. The problem is, a person feels so low that he gives up every effort to fix his feelings. By doing so, he makes an excuse for not being happy. That’s why a person thinks that he doesn’t deserve to be happy because he is not entitled to it.
We all are human beings, and we won’t deny that we got hit by the vicious blows of stress and depression sometimes. But let’s find out first that why do we think we don’t deserve to be happy in the first place? What are the underlying reasons?
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Why Do I Think I Don’t deserve To Be Happy? 5 Underlying Reasons
1. I Don’t Deserve To Be Happy Because Of Past Sins
Past sins might be the reason that you think you don’t deserve to be happy. Life comes in all forms of evil, sometimes, and our past is no more different than that. Every human being does wrong daily. The source of these thoughts of sadness might be lying in your past.
Something you did that shakes your beliefs and perceptions. Therefore one feels he is not entitled to happiness.
2. I Don’t Deserve To Be Happy Due To Survivor’s Guilt
If you survived in an accident or another mishap then you might be having the guilt of the inability to save your significant other. The thought of survivor’s guilt is a gateway to chronic depression and it results badly.
For instance, Elvis Presley’s twin brother died shortly after his birth, and it is in the record that guilt always haunted Elvis that he had survived, and his twin brother had not.
The guilt also comes with a baggage of post-traumatic stress. And that is why one feels he does not deserve to be happy anymore.
3. Trauma Is The Reason I Don’t Deserve To Be Happy
Trauma means the damage to the mind, which occurs after a distressing event. It is often the result of an overwhelming amount of stress that exceeds one’s ability to cope or integrate the emotions involved with that experience.
Now, what does trauma do? It becomes the source of self-sabotage and destroys our abilities to be happy and satisfied in life. Trauma has the power to disrupt our self-image and make us feel low and “dirty” about ourselves.
For instance, women who are sexually abused as children think that they are not worthy of having their children and that alone clouds any feeling of happiness for them.
That is why one feels “I don’t deserve to be happy,” as there might be a hidden trauma that is making him say this.
4. Parental Worry Doesn’t Allow Me To Be Happy
When you become a parent, stress and anxiety become your best friends. You must understand that it is reasonable to undergo stress regarding your children. But you must never let it overwhelm you as you will end up having thoughts of “I don’t deserve to be happy as I can’t be a good mother/father”.
The reality is that parents do stress. They are unable to control their thoughts of dejection and disappointment with everyday lives. Therefore they keep thinking they don’t deserve to be happy.
5. Demanding Self Image
People who analyze themselves critically and want to be perfect in every aspect of their lives forget to be happy down the road to strive. These people are hard-driven and perfectionists, but they come from a critical and abusive childhood. Therefore they believe that they never deserve to be happy because they screw up every time.
There is an angry voice in their heads reminding them how they always screw up, how they are such losers, and how they will never be good enough- a recipe for chronic unhappiness.
After knowing the reasons, let us bring you some kick-ass ways to ward off these feelings of sadness and a recipe to be peaceful and merry.
How To Erode The Thoughts Of “I Don’t Deserve To Be Happy”
1. Yes To Yoga & I Deserve To Be Happy
Yoga has so many benefits that I am indecisive about where to start. Its most significant advantage is that it reduces stress! Yes, it releases stress and anxiety and enhances your power of focus and positivism.
Therefore a ninety-minute yoga ritual won’t make you think again that “I don’t deserve to be happy” anymore. It will make you look on the brighter side of your life.
Therapy should be a part of your monthly routine. Just like getting your eyebrows waxed. It is time for therapy to bring your brain at its normal pace. Therefore, find your self a therapist, and you will believe that you deserve to be happy every day.
3. Write Down Your Thoughts
Writing will allow you to process ideas, thoughts, and work through your emotions. Sometimes the act of just writing something down can help you heal. Therefore, you will feel mentally energized and will think of every opportunity to be happy because you deserve to be happy at every cost.
Aromatherapy has astonishingly significant effects on your mind and body. Therefore, shop for those scented candles and oils. The candles come in a variety of smells. I personally like Lavender with jojoba oil, and it does wonders for me.
Research states that aromatherapy reduces stress, improves sleep quality, and soothes sore joints along with a bunch of other benefits. Therefore, no need to feel sad as a simple act of smelling in and breathing can change your thoughts. It can make you feel that you deserve o be happy.
5. Read And You Will Believe That You Deserve To Be Happy
Reading culture is suffering an alarming decline today due to the burst of technology. But, how important is it to read you have no idea! Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.
It gives muscle to your memory and keeps your brain young. Therefore, why don’t you think it will also make you a changed person? Of course, it will. And you don’t have to read self-help books only. You can read your heart pleases.
It will change your thought process and will make you believe that you have every right to be happy. So when are you going to start reading?
6. Appraise Your Relationships
If you ever have the thoughts of “I don’t deserve to be happy anymore,” then rewind and think about the people who love you. This will include your family and friends. If you are trying to move to new levels, you need the people around you to be committed to the same thing.
Apply the same focus, rigor, and discernment to evaluating friendships as you would use to evaluate your romantic relationships. Find your support system. Once you learn to evaluate your relationships, you will have no trouble is staying and being happy.
7. Start Believing More
Don’t limit yourself to the belief that you don’t deserve to be happy. Look around you and believe more in the power of positivism and goodwill. The problem with limiting beliefs is that they provide an excuse that prevents the person who believes in them from feeling guilty.
Since guilt is a powerful emotion that can motivate a person, the absence of it can ruin a person’s life without his notice.
If you think that you don’t deserve happiness, then you must take serious actions to combat your limiting beliefs, and you will feel a good change in you.
8. Self Harmony Is The Gateway To Be Happy
That is right. Self harmony is the passage towards being happy and contented with your life. The question is how to achieve the stage of self harmony?
Ask yourself who you are and what you want to become. Accept everything you are today and have been doing until now, and you will see your thoughts getting aligned.
Your thoughts will be synced with your actual actions, and you will feel at peace and harmony. May I Add to keep yoga a constant while you strive for self-harmony. It will clear your vision and focus, and therefore, you will believe that you deserve to be happy no matter what.
But How Do Think They Deserve To Be Happy? Here is How
- They look to the past with a sense of fondness and nostalgia. They find a way to see the beauty in their experiences, no matter how good or bad they were.
- Happy people have a sense of appreciation. They know those experiences built positive qualities of their character.
- They look through life with a sense of satisfaction. Things were and are enough.
- Happy people transform their most painful parts into their present-day strengths and gifts.
- Happy people DO NOT compare their experiences with others.
It only matters how you view your life, and everything else gets in place. Therefore, change your perception, and you will eventually believe that you deserve to be happy.
FAQs on I Don’t Deserve To Be Happy:
Does everyone deserve to be happy?
Yes, everyone deserves to be happy. Happiness is for everyone. If you think you can do a thing then you should have faith that yes, I can do it with a positive attitude.
Why do I deserve happiness?
I deserve happiness because the people who have more experiences in their lives are wiser to tell others about the wrong ways. You can’t change the past but you can focus on the future.
What do I deserve in life?
You deserve to be appreciated for all the efforts you have made for yourself as well as for others. You deserve that people should recognize your existence and its importance in your life.
How can I be happy?
You will get peace when you offer gratitude to God for His immense blessings He has given you. By appreciating the little things you have and by acknowledging the unhappy moments to appreciate the happy ones.